try to see things my way

 I just devoured a Big Mac. This is not good. Not at all. Not even a little. I was on this path to losing weight and eating healthy, and now I just ate a Big Mac. And it's not like this is my first one, this is consistent and expected of me. I don't seem to really surprise myself. Self sabotage is the term of the week, coined by my friend Jeanette. And I agree with her, it's all about self sabotaging myself to be happy/content with myself. Why do I do these things? Why?! Ugh... and now it's typical Friday night, home with nobody/nothing going on. Only thing to look forward to is going back to work tomorrow. Yeah...?! uh... 

I hate using this blog to just rant/bitch about everything, I do. I should just focus on other things.

Ok... I watched a movie today, 17 Again with Zac Efron, Matthew Perry, Michelle Trachtenberg. It was fun. Sometimes a bit on the embarrassingly silly side, which was uncomfortable to watch. Almost on the point of cringe worthy. And for you Office fans, Melora Hardin (Jan) was the High School Principal. And apparently her character speaks Elfish. LOL, that was amusing to watch.

Haven't jumped back to the Mood Theme, it was just taking far too long!

So, I am trying to upload a mood theme, but it's taking FOREVER. Please, tell me there is an easier way than adding each image line, one by one.

Please! 

So, this is my official first journey into online blogging, other than my Twitter account. It's been quite some time. And I'd love to say "and so much has happened since then" but sadly, that isn't the case. Life has remained in, shall we say, a standstill. Pretty stagnant. I'm just itching for change to occur or something to be thrown in to mix it up. Yearning for it, truly. But alas, I know that it involves me coming out of my shell and being ME to the world, and for some reason, I am having trouble accepting that. I don't know why. I almost seem pretty comfortable with who I am, in some sense.

Otherwise, I'm still at my same job...which is more or less a good and bad thing. But that will be further dissected later. Along with everything you'd expect someone to discuss in an online blog/journal.

I'm lonely, in every sense of the word. I wake up next to...nobody. And I don't really have anyone to talk to at night, or in general. I bottle up my thoughts/emotions to just be the "friend" everybody needs me to be. And it is just such a crap shoot. I hate being this way. I almost feel like I'm less human because of this. I don't know. I feel like this blog will be used just to rant about how unhappy I am.

Luckily I am also a TV addict, so I can post some great commentary/reviews to balance out the melodramatic moments of my life. A nice blend, don't you think? ;) 

Stay tuned...